Sneak Peek

**Exciting news!! My dad and I are co-authoring a book about lessons learned from celebrity family life. We shine the light on many of the ups and downs that come from being in the public eye, AND from being in the shadows behind. It goes to the editor next week and should be published by Christmas so stand by for updates! The following is an excerpt.

(The format is a little original. We take turns with first person as indicated by our initials. It should make sense as you dive in. If it doesn't... LMK! Anyway, enjoy this sneak peek.)

DW: My Dad was my biggest fan. I don’t remember him ever missing a game or even a practice of any sport that I was involved in and I was involved in all of them; baseball, basketball, football and track all the way through high school. I’d leave a baseball game and jump in the back of his car to change into my track uniform on my way to a track meet.

He and I were always competing around the house in something; ping-pong, pool, basketball or just playing catch in the backyard. He never talked much about his own career so I had to learn about it from other people who raved about what a great athlete he was.

I think my favorite story of him as an athlete was how he hitchhiked from Mesa over to West Phoenix to the Luke Greenway track meet. It was a huge track meet that involved all the schools in the valley. Because he was the only athlete invited from Mesa High, the school could not afford to take a bus just for him and so he was on his own.

At the end of the day, Mesa High placed second in the entire state in the track meet even though dad was the only athlete. High jump, long jump, sprints, distance races. He competed in all of them.

My senior year I was a key part of all of those sports at Westwood High School. I ended up second in the state in the long jump, with my best jump ever of 23’ 4”, a Westwood school record and was named most valuable player in four sports. Those were truly special years for me. My “good ol’ days”!

I can recall clearly the excitement I had as a child of going to watch my dad compete. Church softball and basketball especially were what I lived for. I would go to the games hoping a fight would break out, which it usually did. I liked the fights because my dad would be right in the middle of them and usually was the reason they started in the first place.

He was a pretty competitive guy and everybody loved to get into it with him because he was a former professional football player for the Chicago Bears.

It was especially fun when they didn’t have enough guys to play because then I would get to play. I got to play shortstop when I was eight or nine years old on the local men’s softball team. What a thrill.

Knowing how supportive he was made it especially meaningful one Sunday morning, when after a late Saturday night road game, I slept in and missed church. I was sitting in the family room watching TV when the rest of the family came home. He asked me to come back to the bedroom because he wanted to talk to me.

I knew what he wanted to talk about because it was a Sunday ritual. He would want to know everything about the game, why we did this, why we did that and what I was thinking. We analyzed just about every play this way.

But I was mistaken. That’s not what he wanted to talk about. I sat down on the bed and he said that the next time I missed church because of a sporting event, I was going to have to give up sports. That really hit me hard because I knew what a fan he was. Needless to say, I didn’t miss any more church meetings no matter how late I got home on Saturday night.

Hj: Each weekday, I had to practice piano first thing in the morning. In fact, I wasn’t allowed to leave for school until I’d practiced my full 30 minutes.

How dumb was I? I remember being in college and looking back to those grade school days, wondering why I didn't just boycott piano practice and take a sick day from school! Mom and Dad must’ve had something on me because I do recall a heavy determination to not miss that morning bus!

Basic economics teaches us it’s wise to invest in the things that will last the longest. It would be impossible to count the hours Dad devoted to his athletics, but his parents instilled healthy prioritization habits and to this day, faith, family, and music have played a much more significant role in his life than sports.

When people are feeling unfulfilled or frustrated with their life, there’s almost always a misalignment between their values and their focus. They focus more on things that matter less, and focus less on things that matter more.

The word ‘focus’ rather than ‘spend time’ is intentional verbiage here. If family is your highest priority, it’s unrealistic to spend all your time with them or even for them. That’s unhealthy anyway! But as your first priority, your focus should be primarily on them.

Time is a good indicator of focus, but the two are not synonymous. Examine what your values are, then make sure your focus supports it. Spend time making a living and paying the bills, but if it becomes your focus, you’ll be traumatically unfulfilled when the season ends.